Dear Abby:
I am an Army soldier and I also have a cousin who is a Democrat.
My father has epilepsy and my mother has syphilis, so neither of them can work.
They are totally dependent on my two sisters who are prostitutes in Louisville
because my brother is serving a life term in prison for rape and murder.
I’ve met a nice girl, on the internet; though she knows
nothing of my background, she wants to meet me.
I intend to ask her to marry me as
soon as I settle my bigamy case which is now in court.
When I get out of the Army I intend to move to Detroit and open
a small brothel. My problem, Dear Abby, is this: In view of the fact that
I intend to take this girl as my wife and bring her into the family, should I,
or should I not, tell her about my cousin who is a Democrat?
