1. The roundest knight at King Arthur's round table was Sir Cumference. He acquired his size from too much pi.
2. I thought I saw an eye doctor on an Alaskan island, but it turned out to be an optical Aleutian.
3. She was only a whisky maker, but he loved her still.
4. A rubber band pistol was confiscated from algebra class because it was a weapon of math disruption.
5. The butcher backed into the meat grinder and got a little behind in his work.
6. Now matter how much you push the envelope, it'll still be stationery.
7. A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
8. A grenade thrown into a kitchen in France would result in Linoleum Blownapart.
9. Two silk worms had a race. They ended up in a tie.
10. Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
11. A hole has been found in the nudist camp wall. The police are looking into it.
12. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
13. Two hats were hanging on a hat rack in the hallway. One hat said to the other, 'You stay here, I'll go on a head.'
14. I wondered why the baseball kept getting bigger. Then it hit me.
15. A sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center said: 'Keep off the Grass.'
16. A small boy swallowed some coins and was taken to a hospital. When his grandmother telephoned to ask how he was, a nurse said, 'No change yet.'
17. A chicken crossing the road is poultry in motion.
18. It's not that the man did not know how to juggle, he just didn't have the balls to do it.
19. The short fortune-teller who escaped from prison was a small medium at large.
20. The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
21. A backward poet writes inverse.
22. In democracy it's your vote that counts. In feudalism it's your count that votes.
23. When cannibals ate a missionary, they got a taste of religion.
24. Don't join dangerous cults: Practice safe sects!
25. Obama is ready to be President (the sillest of them all)
MORE THOUGHTS ON OBAMA
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- Porkinator
- Posts: 2087
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- Location: none of your damn business
MORE THOUGHTS ON OBAMA
"Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands
around reloading".--Thomas Jefferson
around reloading".--Thomas Jefferson
Re: MORE THOUGHTS ON OBAMA
Porkinator wrote:25. Obama is ready to be President (the sillest of them all)
That wasn't punny at all. Up pun my word, Pork, there will be pun-ish-mints joust for those leaving the list's punning theme.
I took the tour at the hallow frame for political ideas. Each notion was sitting on a separate window arranged in alphabetical order. "McCain for President" was sill E. It is quite a pane for many Americans to contemplate, and they Barack away from it quickly.
Understandably so, many voters are concerned about being Bush whacked again, and are anxious to avoid a McCain-ing.
Deadly
- Porkinator
- Posts: 2087
- Joined: Wed Feb 15, 2006 7:47 pm
- Location: none of your damn business
Re: MORE THOUGHTS ON OBAMA
Barack sounds like a cat coughing up a fur ball. Maybe the Ms needs to shave down under more .
"Peace is that brief glorious moment in history when everybody stands
around reloading".--Thomas Jefferson
around reloading".--Thomas Jefferson
Re: MORE THOUGHTS ON OBAMA
Porkinator wrote:Barack sounds like a cat coughing up a fur ball. Maybe the Ms needs to shave down under more .
You've been fantasizing about the Obama's sex life, again. Be careful, or Obama will give you a licking like you've never had before.
Deadly
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